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12x12 Project
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11 comments:
I think she is jumping the gun by calling Motherhood boring. I think some womem love the baby years, some love the toddler years, some love teenagers. Some women are good at all stages and some just have to get through the ones that are tough for them.
I don't think everyone should have children though. If you can't get through the baby years maybe you should just be a fantastic aunt, or one of mom's "cool friends". She seems to enjoy older kids so maybe she should just mentor instead of parent. I am not outraged though...it was just her opinion.
I think she's under the Oprah delusion that everything a woman does ought to be empowering, and is missing the fact that what might boring is still an extremely important and noble thing to do.
But then again, I'm a man incapable of watching my own child, so take that with a grain of salt.
This is an interesting topic. It's funny how angry everyone seems to be about it. Why can't she just have her opinion?
I wouldn't say motherhood is boring, but it can certainly be thankless, tedious, and frustrating. I suppose it's all in the way you look at it. Those of us who have chosen to have children and to be involved in their lives know that it's work, but with a different kind of payment. It's a huge investment of time, effort and love.
I think the woman who wrote the article has distanced herself from her kids and is missing the joys and entertainment of the various stages of their development. Kid stuff is definitely boring if there's something else you'd rather be doing.
Maybe the critics are upset because they're the opposite extreme and have defined themselves through their children but think they're doing the world a favor by indulging their every whim.
It definitely is an interesting topic. I find it really uneventful at times, but wouldn't change it for the world. Maybe she should of rethought having kids if she found it to be boring. I sometimes do wish I had at least 1-2 days of going to work just to have adult conversations.
So the reason I sent this article to Lara, and thought it would be an interesting blog topic, is that it doesn't bother me at all that this mom thinks her life is boring. (Or that she thinks the mother part of her life is boring.) I realize that not everyone loves hanging out with their kid every second like I do. (But I also think I have a very unhealthy codependant relationship with my daughter, which is a topic to discuss with my future thearapist.) So what if she doesn't love everything about being a mom? It's okay that people don't love everything about their full time employment, why should this be different? She loves her kids, that doesn't mean she has to love being with them every second. I personally think it is okay to be a mother and be glad that you kids go to school for 6 hours a day. I liked the kids argument that she is on the computer all the time and he finds that boring.
Of course it is a different issue if she is neglecting or harming her children. That is inexcusable. But being bored with Barbie, not that big of a deal.
She makes a point, I'm not sure she goes about it in the right way, though. True, no one wants a narcissistic child, but where's the evidence that taking pleasure in child-rearing is going to create such self-centered children? I respect her honest journalism but still hang on to the adage that "you make your own happiness".
I think some parts of motherhood are 'boring', but really, who goes into it thinking that changing diapers and reading the same book 20 times a day is going to be the most engaging activity out there? Some of it is perspective though, I mean if you focus on the negative/boring aspects of motherhood then it is easier to not see all the rewarding parts of it. Just like if you focus on the negative of anything it gets harder to have a good attitude and see the positives.
My Grandma always tells us that only boring people have boring lives, so maybe her kids are just boring kids and are not stimulating enough for their mom...just kidding.
I do find it interesting how angry some people get over it- it is just one woman's opinion, she is not the spokeswoman for all mothers or anything.
I thought the most interesting part of the article was the woman's declared main point, which was "to denounce the child-centric model of parenting." Ha! What's the alternative, then? What would be involved in the "parent-centric" model of parenting?
Anyhow, I like reading contemporary fiction, waterskiing, brussel sprouts, and being a mom. Anyone is welcome to agree or disagree with any of the above.
so interesting. i really don't know what to say.
i guess i would say everyone can have an opinon on how they see thier life as a mom.
maybe that is why every event in our home is like a circus and a big event, to get me from day to day and not get bored.
changing diapers to me are not boring, they are exciting you never know what you might find in there and in our house i mean it.
i will say i am a little opninonated on the many moms who spend too much time on the phone around their kids especially in the car, for crying out loud talk to your kids!
step off soap box now...
I know we all get to have our opinions but that includes me and I have a lot of them!
I was not offended at the bored parts (but I don't allow my kids to use that word so should I? - especially in reference to them. And like Hannah said if you're bored your probably boring!) So I think this gives away much more about the author than her kids or her mothering.
However, the "working to avoid spending time" with them and that she is a "good enough" mother. That makes me mad! You wouldn't talk to your friends that way don't say it to your kids. Can you imagine the hurt from having your mom - say she avoided you?!
I would never say that motherhood is boring. It is certainly thankless and tedious much of the time, as Jill said. But I don't know how I could be bored, it's the most challenging thing I've ever done!
My grandma told me that children are not boring, but quite often their games and conversations are. :) I have to agree. I think my children are wonderful, dynamic individuals, but my eyes do glaze over when Lucas is telling me all about his video games...
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