I ask my self this question on a regular basis. Sometimes I think my filter is broken.
So a girlfriend from church was having a girl over that has just recently moved with her family to Dallas. They are currently looking for a house to rent and since they are new, she wanted to host a little lunch for her. I ended up going, more for the food, because I can get out of control with my opinion about our ward. I love our ward and think it is the best. I would strongly encourage anyone to move in. I was fairly aggressive when we lived in the branch in NOLA and probably offended many people, so I didn't want to repeat that horrible experience. So- I decided to keep my mouth shut and not put in my two cents about where they should be looking. Instead, I totally offended her in another way. She was telling us that her husband grew up abroad, his mom is French and got remarried to a Canadian. Anyone that knows Adam, also knows his bizarre hatred of both the French and anyone from Canada. So- I kind of giggled and proceeded to tell her about his entirely unfounded opinion. Hello. I just told her that my husband hates her husband and his family. What is wrong with me? I knew I was in trouble when Carrie had this HORRIFIED look on her face. I quickly realized my folly and tried to correct it, but ... really- how do you come back from that little comment?
I am completely against anyone that is excused for their remarks because "that is just so and so." This does not give someone free reign for bad manners. I never want/wanted to be that person, so I really do try to hold my tongue and not say what pops into my head immediately (obviously it isn't working). Unfortunately I just say what I think and do not apologize for it, but it gets me in trouble. I'm just too honest to a fault sometimes. I realize this. I'm sure I have offended people in every aspect of my life, but for the most part it really is innocent and I am horrified when I offend someone and would never want to make someone feel bad. It usually eats away at me for days.
I cannot believe I actually said it. I will have to change my middle name to either "no filter at all" or "put her foot in her mouth".
I should be kept away from social situations. Now it is going to gnaw at me for days!
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7 comments:
You should just tell her that your grandmother is Canadian, that might make it better. And how did i miss that Adam has this thing. I would say blame it on the family curse, I am the same way, and always am calling people back to apologize. Don't fret too much over it, just move on and show her in your awesome Lara ways that you are one of the most caring, loving, and funny people she will meet.Sorry for the blunder.
Maybe send her a note, complete with your customary great self-depricating sense of humor, she will realize that you are innocent, perhaps nervous about not wanting to procelatize about the ward, and let something else slip out instead. You do have a tact sensor, I find you to be very thoughtful and not at all how you described, so don't be as worried as you feel. I'd tell you if you were such a bad egg:) LOVE YOU!
That sounds so much like ME! My mom is worse so I know where it came from. I have been trying my whole adult life to get over it. Some days are better than others.
I almost shared an example of where I made a fool of myself, but decided if I did I most likely would offend someone new. So, I just want you to know I totally sympathize with you. I feel your pain.
You know how when you are telling a story and the person you are recapping to says "Did you say that?" and the rest of the world (except maybe you) says "no, but I wanted to.." I ALWAYS say, "yes."
I try to bite my tongue but it doesn't work and while I go too far my biggest pet peeve is when people won't tell you what they really think and are always "politically correct."
Oh dear, I hate when this happens! Too funny about Adam and the French/Canadians. (I've lived in France a couple of times and I used to defend them. Now I freely admit they are damn rude.) But Canadians? Interesting.
My grandma says that she prays every day that she won't say everything that's on her mind. (She thinks she's a know-it-all, but I really do think she does know it all.) I agree with Amie: being open and honest is better than not saying what you think, even if it does cause you to put your foot in your mouth occasionally!
my opinion is neither bizarre nor unfounded.
You kill me, what a crack up you are. I say, enjoy your honesty and unfilteredness, I do. I find it slightly refreshing.
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